It may sound like a command on Family Feud: “Name the Top Three Reasons People Get Divorced!” However, unfortunately, when the time comes to dissolve a marriage, statistics often speak for themselves. It may not help that you aren’t inventing a new reason to part way, but you may find some comfort in the fact that what you are going through can be overcome – as many others have gone before you.
Some of the leading causes of divorce include:
InfidelityAbout 17% of all divorces are filed because of infidelity. There is data to indicate that 70 percent of married men cheat on their wives. Although most people who cheat claim that it’s not about love, the thought of their partner sharing a bed with someone else is enough to create irreversible trust issues. While many married couples are able to move past this, there are many others that find an indiscretion to be simply unforgivable.
Lack of CommitmentFor many, the idea of marriage is stronger than the actual act. Lack of preparation and fast-tracked engagements often lead people to the eventual realization that they have no desire to spend the rest of their life with the person looking across from them at the breakfast table every morning. This often leads to lack of communication, excessive arguing and eventual cheating. If you feel as though you or your spouse is not committed to the marriage, it might be time to have a frank and honest conversation regarding your future together.
Grown ApartAlmost the opposite of lack of commitment, you’ve stayed together for the children or because of financial reasons, etc. Now, the kids have grown and the two of you don’t want the same things anymore. Growing apart is not unusual, especially in long-term relationships.
Financial IssuesIt’s unfortunate to say so, but there is, perhaps, no better window into a person’s true personality than how they regard money. It’s also a testament to how strong a marriage actually is. It’s surprising how much a simple conversation about bills can bring to light, and what weaknesses it exposes in a couple’s dynamic. In addition to the general stress caused by money problems, one spouse can grow resentful of the other if they feel as though they’re carrying more than their fair share of the financial burden.
You’re not a bad person for wanting to be happy in your marriage. When it comes time to finally ask your spouse for a divorce, you are understandably weighed down by all everything and everyone you know will be affected by your decision. Protect your children, your assets and your sanity but hiring a skilled divorce lawyer who will safeguard your interests.
Graziano and Flynn, P.C. has been helping New Jersey couples divorce for years. If you and your spouse are resolved in your divorce plans, call us today for a free consultation.